FWIW your anxiety sounds pretty par for the course. Why wouldn't it be totally nerve-wracking to be responsible for the life of another human, after all? Isn't that the most existential angst of all?
Here's something I wish someone had told me when I brought my first baby home: We've been indoctrinated to believe that motherhood should come "naturally," and for many of us there's absolutely nothing natural about it. So if you had some magical motherhood standard you were holding yourself to, just ... let it go. Have compassion for the fact that you're learning how to do this IRL, and feeling anxious is a sign that you're a competent, loving person who wants to do it well. Caring for another human is learned behavior and trained instincts, and you are learning and training! You got this!
All of this -- and you've just met Georgia and your new post-partum self and Tom may be "fun," but he, uh, wasn't just pregnant, didn't give birth, and isn't breastfeeding. Studies show that even in same sex couples, the birthing partner wakes and responds to middle-of-the-night baby crying faster than the mom who didn't give birth. Also, for me, becoming a mom inspired a level of love I'd never felt and a type vulnerability that was wholly new. It's all new.....
I would read every one of those proposed articles! Also, first time parenting is especially hard. Once your whole brain re-wires itself, you'll feel better ;)
I remember my dad saying, when my daughter was an infant and I was consumed with anxiety, "just wait until she's a teenager." So not helpful! There is a particular anxiety that accompanies caring for a helpless, hairless creature that definitely goes away as they mature and become self-sufficient. (Though, yeah, it is replaced by other worries...)
Ha! Claire, I love this. I remember when I was pregnant, thinking "God I can't wait for this to be over so I don't have to WORRY anymore," and even as I thought it, I knew it was mostly a joke, but also ... "lolol" ❤️❤️❤️
You're doing great and it does get easier. You'll get into a groove with her care and she won't be quite so helpless and delicate, and then she'll accidentally tumble off the bed when you didn't think she could move that far yet but it'll be ok. Give yourself grace for all of it because it really is so intense the first few months. I so enjoy reading about your experiences as a new mom!
I'm really enjoying the feeling I have for learning from your comic strip about you and Tom and Georgia.
Good title today. It sounds as if you might enjoy moments of modeling your former self and Tom. Like you are studying for an acting part. "[Tension makes itself known.] Hm? If there's no immediate danger... [A moment of reflection.] How would I (or Tom) act in my most resourceful state? Can I copy that?"
Personally, I fail as often as I succeed in such efforts to bring my best self to moments. But the effort feels worthwhile, and generally on an upward trend. :)
FWIW your anxiety sounds pretty par for the course. Why wouldn't it be totally nerve-wracking to be responsible for the life of another human, after all? Isn't that the most existential angst of all?
Here's something I wish someone had told me when I brought my first baby home: We've been indoctrinated to believe that motherhood should come "naturally," and for many of us there's absolutely nothing natural about it. So if you had some magical motherhood standard you were holding yourself to, just ... let it go. Have compassion for the fact that you're learning how to do this IRL, and feeling anxious is a sign that you're a competent, loving person who wants to do it well. Caring for another human is learned behavior and trained instincts, and you are learning and training! You got this!
I love this. Thank you, Jenny.
Having a baby will do this to you. You're freaking out because you care! But the panic will subside in time. <3
It better or I want my money back Linda
All of this -- and you've just met Georgia and your new post-partum self and Tom may be "fun," but he, uh, wasn't just pregnant, didn't give birth, and isn't breastfeeding. Studies show that even in same sex couples, the birthing partner wakes and responds to middle-of-the-night baby crying faster than the mom who didn't give birth. Also, for me, becoming a mom inspired a level of love I'd never felt and a type vulnerability that was wholly new. It's all new.....
I would read every one of those proposed articles! Also, first time parenting is especially hard. Once your whole brain re-wires itself, you'll feel better ;)
❤️❤️❤️
I remember my dad saying, when my daughter was an infant and I was consumed with anxiety, "just wait until she's a teenager." So not helpful! There is a particular anxiety that accompanies caring for a helpless, hairless creature that definitely goes away as they mature and become self-sufficient. (Though, yeah, it is replaced by other worries...)
Ha! Claire, I love this. I remember when I was pregnant, thinking "God I can't wait for this to be over so I don't have to WORRY anymore," and even as I thought it, I knew it was mostly a joke, but also ... "lolol" ❤️❤️❤️
You're doing great and it does get easier. You'll get into a groove with her care and she won't be quite so helpless and delicate, and then she'll accidentally tumble off the bed when you didn't think she could move that far yet but it'll be ok. Give yourself grace for all of it because it really is so intense the first few months. I so enjoy reading about your experiences as a new mom!
❤️❤️❤️
<3 <3 <3
I'm really enjoying the feeling I have for learning from your comic strip about you and Tom and Georgia.
Good title today. It sounds as if you might enjoy moments of modeling your former self and Tom. Like you are studying for an acting part. "[Tension makes itself known.] Hm? If there's no immediate danger... [A moment of reflection.] How would I (or Tom) act in my most resourceful state? Can I copy that?"
Personally, I fail as often as I succeed in such efforts to bring my best self to moments. But the effort feels worthwhile, and generally on an upward trend. :)
Best regards,
David
I really like this. Thank you, David.